self branding / portfolio

I have found it difficult to put together a professional portfolio without any guidance or surgeries this year. For my final portfolio I would like a printed magazine type publication rather than a folder, so I can send them to studios to keep. This would also show my layout skills and initiative, hopefully enabling me to stand out from the crowd. 

I have produced a set of layouts that show an example of how my work would be laid out in a portfolio: 

These designs are not yet final and I would like to get some feedback from portfolio surgeries before printing my actual portfolio.